When Someone at your Church Acts like a Turkey

This post is for church goers.

It´s for those who have been offended by someone´s behavior in church or on church property.

I am writing this post because sometimes we need to discuss these very human and common experiences in church life. Some things just need to be said.

Church is full of humans. Not humanoids, not robots....but flesh and blood humans.

Of course it can hurt when someone offends you in your own church. You are a human being with a soft heart.....of course you are going to get your feelings hurt sometimes. If you never were disappointed or offended in some way, I would wonder if you were truly human. To be human is to feel . To be human is to experience all kinds of feelings, not just the happy feelings.....and that is ok. I believe that part of God´s healing power in us shows up in melting our stony hearts so that we can feel deeply again. Feeling deeply is a blessing....even when sometimes the emotions we feel include feeling hurt or disappointed.

Church is no different than any other public place filled with human beings. The difference is that we may have different expectations for behavior in church spaces. We expect kindness, gentleness, generosity and a certain amount of familiarity, especially if it is a church that we attend regularly and consider a significant part of our lives.

Here comes the hard part. Sometimes we go to church without getting a chance to prepare our hearts to worship God. We lose focus on why we go to church. We start looking at the people in the church instead of tuning our hearts in a spiritual way towards our Maker. 

We may have been in a rush to get there on time....we may have lost one sock out of a pair of socks, and could´t find the car keys.... or realize that when we got in the car, that we were out of gas. Maybe the cat missed the litter box. It happens.

 Perhaps we had hoped to bring a generous gift to the church only to realize that we didn´t have any money that day to give. We didn´t want to come to church empty handed, but that is how life rolled that day. Life, just like church life,... is sometimes full of  disappointments, hasty occasions, and awkward experiences.

When I was a teenager, I recall showing up at school with a dryer sheet sticking out the bottom of my pant leg. How embarrassing! But I survived and now giggle about it. So too, all kinds of embarrassing things can happen at church. Sometimes we just have to grin and bear it and carry on. Don´t let something silly keep you from attending church to worship your God.

There are a million different reasons why we may arrive at church in a ¨less than ideal¨ frame of mind. But that doesn´t make it hurt less when we experience a ¨less than friendly¨ event. Just knowing and acknowledging our human frailty makes us more understanding of those who may act out. Sometimes folks are going through things, things that we don´t know about and can´t possibly understand.

 As much as it may be very difficult to do ... sometimes we just need to let things go..... We can choose to overlook an insult and accept a lame excuse for rude behavior. 

 Sometimes we need to learn how to not hang on to an offense, even when the experience really hurt or offended us. To  let go of any offense, doesn´t mean it didn´t happen. To overlook an offense, just means we are disciplining our hearts and not reacting to someone´s bad behavior. We are choosing to be gracious and to keep our eyes on the prize. Who is the prize? Who is the prize? Your holy God....Jesus.

Churches are full of human beings, living in an imperfect world.

Chin up, brothers and sisters, you will make it through. You will still belong to the Kingdom of God, even if you experience something imperfect in a church space. And the beautiful thing is....is when we choose to forgive someone else for their insensitivity, we will also be forgiven for our own mistakes. Grace begets more grace. Forgiveness begets more forgiveness.

So maybe someone uttered something under their breath that you weren´t supposed to hear. Maybe someone didn´t greet you politely. Maybe someone didn´t show proper respect for the contributions, financial or otherwise... that you have given into the church. Maybe someone forgot your name or your child´s name. Maybe they spelled it wrong. Perhaps someone didn´t acknowledge an event in your life that you thought they should have remembered. It happens. You will survive. Don´t give up on God or on being a part of His kingdom just because you have noticed some failings.

Maybe someone that you have been praying for...for months, cuts you off in the parking lot. Maybe they didn´t hold the door open for you or a family member. Maybe they cut short your conversation to go talk to someone else. Maybe they ignored you...or didn´t return your phone call. Maybe they didn´t respond to your attempt at a friendly greeting. You will survive. You will get over it.

It just might be time to pray. If you are a sensitive person, you may feel things more deeply than others do. Since you are a person of faith, you have a Spiritual  Savior that you can speak to about this or some other awkward church event. Talk it over in your prayer time with your God. He can hear you. He loves you. He cares.

He just may give you an understanding of what went on that day....or He might say...¨Trust Me my child, because  there is so much at stake right now¨. Stay peaceful. Don´t give up your place in His kingdom. Stay humble.

Now, I must mention the other side of this issue....just to be fair.

 There are times, where, if you have experienced something really bad at church, that you need to speak up. You may start by speaking with your spouse or your parent, or a good friend about the situation. You may need to go to one of the church leaders and get their perspective on what has gone on. Is there something going on that needs to be addressed by church leadership? Is your safety or the safety of another church member under threat?

Some things are important and not to be overlooked. Try to handle sensitive issues in a respectful and confidential manner, without putting your own safety at risk.

Pray for God´s wisdom. Pray to discern what you should overlook and what must be addressed. Wisdom is the principal thing.

Lastly, I think of the verse.....

Matthew 18:21 and 22 (ESV)

Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” 22Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.

In closing. Whether what you have experienced in church was good or bad or a mixture of both, I pray that you will be given the grace to carry on. I pray that you will be given the spiritual power to observe the bible verse pasted above.....and be able to forgive all,....both small or great offenses. For those of you who have been offended more than once, I pray that you will have the power, the raw spiritual power, to forgive fully and completely...so that your heart will become free and healthy enough to live fully and laugh with joy. I pray that you will be able to experience every good thing that God has for you and your family.

I pray that you will carry on and not give up on being a part of the modern church family. We are on a journey together whether we like it or not. We are aiming for Heaven.

Peace, my brothers and sisters....thanks for listening.

Carla.

Crashing Waves welcomed me to the Bay today...

Just sharing with you a glimpse of the lovely Kempenfelt Bay, which wraps around

Innisfil, Barrie and Shanty Bay in Ontario.

The sound of the crashing waves....tip toeing on the foresty path heading to the water´s edge. For me, a little piece of heaven on earth.

Enjoy, my nature loving friends.

Peace,

Carla.

What My 10,000 Tenants Tell Us About The Economy

This very real interview with a property management company or large landowner is very eye opening. 

As a Canadian, I understand this is not the same as my native Canada....but is definitely worth a viewing if you have any interest at all in what the average joe is facing in terms of affordable housing and the process of renting.

It is also a great ¨behind the scenes¨ peak at what landlords are doing in order to keep happy tenants and protect their assets.

Peace and do leave a comment on this video. 

Carla

Do We Let Breathe?

Tweet

With greater authority and remote access comes greater temptation to micromanage and disturb natural processes. Many natural processes have been cycling for hundreds and thousands of years. They are beautiful to behold in all their rugged consistency. Natural processes are not perfect, but they are steady and they always move gently forward.

Cameras are everywhere now. They are not just viewing what we do in public spaces, but also collecting data about how we live,work and shop, worship..... how long we linger in certain spaces and much much more. 

It used to feel comforting that when you had a cell phone in your hand, that you could always reach out for assistance or reach a family member if there was an emergency.

But things are now much more complicated now. Our ¨smart ¨ phones and other ¨smart¨ devices in our homes and workplaces are collecting so much data about all we are and all we say and type and where we go and how fast or slow we go there. Every aspect of our lives has been sliced and diced, collected somewhere large or small, hidden or public ......and in many cases, sold to companies or governments who may benefit from that data.

In the business world too, there are a plethora of methods that managers can use to monitor and micromanage those whom they believe are their underlings. Cameras, keystroke monitors, screen recorders. Some of this monitoring is revealed to the underlings, and some of it is not. 

The thought that has occupied my mind this morning is simply this. Are we still allowing people to breathe? Are we trusting those around us to grow and prosper that which is within their care, or are we so mistrusting that we feel we must micromanage every moment of another human being´s day? Just because we can see and hear and monitor every moment of an employee´s day, doesn´t mean we should try to virtually control their every action. Humans needs to breathe. When humans sense that their every moment is under surveillance...they start to behave in less human ways.

I don´t know if you have ever had the misfortune of doing telemarketing and being handed a ¨script¨ which the employer expected you to utter word for word to whichever ¨target¨ you connected with on the phone. Having the words you speak controlled 100% by an employer is truly a terrible thing to experience.

So what I am proposing is the opposite of micromanaging and overbearing control.

I am talking the spiritual habit of holding up the greater good. I am talking about having faith in humanity and bringing joy and liberty to our daily lives. Let´s face it....no one likes to be micromanaged. Even when there is the possibility of making an error, we still don´t want to be micromanaged. Our inner being instinctively knows we are not created for this. Our spirits were created to sing with individuality and imagination.

I realize that in the workplace or other organizations we come across situations where we need ¨coaching¨. But coaching people and controlling people are 2 entirely different approaches. When we coach another human being, we are acknowledging their own desire to do well, to improve and increase in whatever they are putting their hand to.   A person who submits to coaching is aware of their own power to succeed or fail and is aiming for success. People who are success minded love to be coached, because they know it will provide increase in their lives. Coaching is empowering. Controlling is not.

Conversely, when we micromanage another human being, we are saying quite boldly that we do not trust their instincts, we do not trust their desire to improve and are circumventing their own autonomy with our own oppressive desire to control another human being.

If you have been blessed with a position of supervision, or management in any kind of organization,  I pray that you will choose the option of coaching rather than controlling. By choosing to coach you will be honoring the humanity and dignity of those you supervise.  What goes around always comes around. Sowing seeds of respect for other humans into your daily life breeds respect into your own future and the future of your loved ones. An atmosphere of dignity and honor has healing powers and brings peace to all who have the privilege of living in it.

Create an atmosphere of respect and consideration. Create an atmosphere where you sow kindness and gentle suggestions into an over controlled and over monitored generation. It´s really hard to turn back technology.  But you can choose honor and dignity and considerate kindness.

Peace,

Carla

When you Hear an Honest and Refreshing Perspective

99.999 percent of us are getting our sources of info from media of all sorts and formats.

When I sense that a certain writer or blogger or youtuber is truthful, I pay attention. I tend to bookmark those content creators and I often try to give a shoutout to some of them when I get the chance. 

I want to promote people who are interested in spin, or appeasing some kind of sponsor.

So, today I just wanted to mention a very very tiny thing I noticed about Mr Robin Greenfield.

He is a counter culture type of person who tries to live and exemplify a lifestyle with what he calls the ¨trappings¨ and lifestyle of modern man.

THis one thing I noticed that I have NEVER heard anyone talk about, is that in all the loud endorsements that folks have for recycling household tins and plastics, NO one has yet talked about the cost of cleaning this items to prepare for the recycling bin.

No one mentioned this UNTIL I heard Robin Greenfield speak about this.

He mentioned in one of his youtube videos that he was consciously thinking about how much water is used and/wasted during the process of washing out a food can before being able to toss it into a local blue or green recycling bin. WHO else do you know thinks like that???

Most of us think little about the cost of tap water, let alone how much tap water is used just to wash out a tin can or glass jar before placing it into our own recycling bins that collect the goods before we set them at the curb for city wide recyclable collection.

What do you think about that issue? Do you think it isn´t wasteful to use tap water to wash or rinse out all recyclable items before you place them in your recycle bin? Do you think that water is well used? Do you mind paying for that tap water that you use to wash out your recyclables?

Do tell. And by the way, if you have heard of anyone else who has mentioned this issue before? I would be curious to hear anyone else´s perspective on this cost of tap water that is a hidden cost of recycling which falls onto the shoulders of the homeowner.

Also if you are interested in learning a little more about Rob Greenfield´s way of looking out at the world.....here is his youtube moniker https://www.youtube.com/@Robin.Greenfield

Peacefully yours,

Carla

Tweet

Purple Sauerkraut.... Made Cheap and Easily at Home

Here are all the things I use to make my own casual batch of homemade purple sauerkraut:

3 large strong glass canning jars, with canning lids with rings.

3 Bowls or plastic trays to catch drips during fermentation

10 days of time is all I needed to reach the ideal taste and level of ferment for my home in Ontario Canada.

Non Iodized Pickling Salt

Pure reverse osmosis water

1 Large Fresh Purple Cabbage Head

Clear Plastic Sandwich bags.

======================

I chopped approximately half of the head of cabbage into fairly chunky bits about the size of a silver dollar.

I sprinkled the pickling salt on the cabbage after chopping it and massaged it into the cabbage. 

(note that if you are uncomfortable with using your instincts to measure the salt, you can use the 2% salt by weight formula....simply by weighing the chopped cabbage first and then adding 2% of that weight in pickling salt)

Then I packed it tightly  into the 3 large canning jars , packing it down with the end tip of a wooden spoon....trying to push out the air between the cabbage bits.  Then I added some pure water to cover all the cabbage in the jar. 

Now, here is the fun part. I learned this next part from watching youtube videos. I took a clear plastic sandwich bag and filled just one bottom corner of it with water and placed it while still open at the top on the cabbage to weight it down so that all the cabbage is weighed down under the brine water. Then I rolled the edges of the bag down over the lip of the jar and then I tool the metal ring and screwed it on top of the plastic bag just tight enough to keep the bag in place and provide a clean airtight seal on the jar of pickled cabbage.

Then I placed the jar carefully in a drip tray and put it into a dark wooden cabinet to ferment.

Every 2 or 3 days I would check on the jars and replace the drip tray with a clean one and replace the plastic bags with new fresh bags filled with more clean pure water to weight the cabbage down under the brine water.

The beauty of using those canning rings with just the water filled plastic bags to weigh down the cabbage, is that you don´t risk any dangerous gas buildup due to the fermentation .The plastic can stretch with the gas buildup and with  a drip tray the bubbling over will be caught and won´t damage your cabinet.

When I wanted to check it it was ripening well enough, I used my senses of taste and smell to see if I could identify the right level of ferment and saltiness. ( I added extra salt when I felt that the pickling process tasted too watery.

When I did my final taste test on the sauerkraut it had been 10 days since I had begun the ferment. 

I realize that this time frame is ideal for the temperature inside our home and the other factors such as the level of humidity and the ripeness of the cabbage etc.

I feel it is important when I make homemade fermented products like this, that I stay in tune with what  I taste and smell and feel about the product. Fermentation is sometimes unpredictable and you need to be willing to throw foods out if you feel that some kind of harmful bacteria has begun to sprout in your beloved fermented creation. (Moldy or unclean foods should not be used for making any kind of pickles or fermented products.)

This may seem obvious, but when making sauerkraut make sure that all your utensils and jars are spotlessly clean. If some stray bits of the cabbage stick to the edges or neck of your jar during the process, just take some paper towel and wipe them clean off the jar. Keep the neck and lip and lids of the jar as clean as possible. This will protect the ferment from unwanted bacteria.

The final step is to add the metal lid to the canning rings and put the fermented cabbage jar into the refridgerator for storage. Yumm!

Have you ever done any natural fermentation at home?

Do tell!

Peace,

Carla

Tweet

Overspending on Basics?

Sometimes when folks are in a bind.... they keep their low budget shopping very confidential. They think, of course, that they are the only ones who count their nickels when buying their basic needs. 

I am writing this post to remind you that the stores you shop in are GREATLY aware of the discounts and grand totals that you can afford. Stores don´t just market to the rich. Some stores yes, may market only to luxury shoppers, but there is a multitude of stores that are seeking the shopping dollars of those who shop frugally. 

A dollar is a dollar is a dollar. Retailers count dollars, not shoppers. They do not get bonus points for catering to rich clients. They get bonus points for being profitable, no matter who their customers are, they are OUT TO PROTECT THEIR PROFITS, nothing more and nothing less.

So, let me get to the point. I was shopping this week for some simple bath bars of soap. I was feeling like I didn´t want to overspend, so I thought, why don´t I check for a multipack of Ivory soap bars. Did you know I could not find any multi-packs online for Ivory soap at a certain large retailer for under 6 dollars Canadian? I could only find one little cream colored bar of soap (not Ivory) for $2.54. Canadian funds. 

The weight on the package was only 100 grams. I find that rather unusual. So, in my understanding, that particular retailer was taking advantage of the basic need for folks need for simple bars of soap, by refusing to offer a lower cost multipack, even if the brand of the soap was considered a low end brand.

So, friends that is where we may need to jot down some notes. When you begin to notice certain items being ¨controlled¨ in the marketplace with ¨higher than normal¨ pricing, take a few notes. Write down the quantity of what you are seeking ( the weight and/or volume) and the brand and the date you were shopping and what store you were in or what online retailer you were browsing.

The reason I pasted a photo of a jar of Canada Red pasta sauce in this post is for an example of what we can choose when we want to keep the cost of basics low and still get exactly what we need. 

A local retailer sells one jar of 640 ml of Canada Red pasta sauce for $2.77 in Canadian funds. 

In my estimation that is a reasonable price currently for a large jar of pasta sauce that is available within a reasonable distance from my residence.

Sometimes, it is helpful to get some concrete lists going of what you can buy and where for reasonable prices. Make your list easily accessible and stay organized. For example, maybe your local dollar store is a good place to buy table salt. Maybe you find that price to be better than at your local grocery store and you trust the brand that is on the label of table salt at that dollar store. Add that item to your list if you are satisfied with the value. 

Value is something that is often in the eye of the beholder...but there is wisdom in honoring your OWN sense of value and not being swayed by all the propaganda and marketing that modern retailers throw at us.

Honor your wallet and your own decision making skills and carve out a fabulous discipline of buying products that meet YOUR demands for quality and price and brand and availability.

Children do not have an innate understanding of value and money. It is a skill to develop as you mature and independently manage your funds. Writing down lists of items that meet YOUR requirements for quality, price and location is a great idea to help you and your family keep quality items in stock in your home.

That´s all for now. Congratulations on your endeavor to develop personal discipline with your money and overcoming the outside influences that may tempt you to spend more than you want to. 

Peace and productivity,

Carla

Tweet

Adapt or Die (Full Episode) | Life Below Zero

Life Below Zero---one of my favorite northern reality shows.

I am always delighted when I am able to catch an episode, old or new of this series.

I respect characters who are proud of their survival skills and the traditions that go along with that mastery.

Some of the characters in this series, such as Sue Aikens, explain to the viewers how they crave the extreme isolation. They love the challenge of it, and the ability to manage their own lives and livelihood in their own style.

I don´t think I have ever actually met someone so extreme and independent as Sue Aikens, but perhaps some of my dutch relatives, past or present might disagree. I was raised by strong dutch work ethic and the strength of character that defines someone who refuses to give up and never gives in, when faced with an obstacle.

Do you enjoy these Life Below Zero episodes? What do you learn from watching them beat the odds?

Do tell,

the comment section is always open to you.

Peace,

Carla